Getting back in the game after a bad break up or divorce can take a lot of courage, so congratulations on making the first step towards a fully booked social calendar! Before you dive right into the dating deep end without taking any swimming lessons, follow these tips to a healthy and fresh new start in your romantic life.
Claim Your Baggage
There is no sense denying that you have just gone through a traumatic and painful split from your significant other. So, why sit around and pretend as if nothing happened? Instead of living in a state of denial, come to terms with what exactly went wrong (no matter who is to blame) and really realize and internalize why your past relationship went sour.
The last thing you need to do is to repeat the same mistakes while you are trying to improve your situation. However, without self-awareness and a keen observation of your own past behaviors, it is very common for this to occur. Own up to your past and you will have a better chance of moving towards a positive and passionate future. For instance, do you have a “type” that keeps letting you down? It is only through deep consideration that you may recognize this pattern. Once this problem is detected, it can be changed and your new “type” just could fit the bill.
Readjust Your Priorities
Chances are that the last time you were searching for love you had different priorities and a different lifestyle than what you have now. In this time of self-reassessment, take some time out to examine where you currently are in life and project where you would like to be in the future.
This truly is an essential step to getting what you want out of your next life partner, hook up or romantic companion. For instance, if you recently decided that you would like to start a family, focus on finding someone who is ready for this next step in life. Try to meet a suitable person who has the mother or father stamp of approval.
If you are constantly comparing people to your ex, you may be disappointed, particularly in the bedroom. Bear in mind that your ex had time to get to know you and your body. Chances are that they had to learn about these unique parts of you over a long period of time. Cut any people you meet some slack, as you are strangers at the beginning, after all.
Beware of having ridiculously high standards of beauty as well. Remember that looks change constantly and weight loss, weight gain, hair style, skin color, clothing styles and muscle tone are not set in stone. Whether his teeth are all jacked up or her waist is too big, those physical features do not reveal the character, morals or beliefs of your potential date. While you must feel a spark or a definite chemistry with your future intimacy partner, personality goes a long way and it changes less frequently than outward appearance.