Post hook up, one question burns on the mind: to tell others or not to tell others? Don’t worry, we have all been there. Here are the top 5 reasons not to kiss and tell.
1. Building Trust
Intimacy is a bond between two people. Many people feel as though this intimacy is broken if it is spoken about (especially in detail or in great length) to anyone who was not involved in the act itself. The level of intimacy grows along with the trust level within the relationship. Therefore it behooves anyone who desires a trusting and trustworthy partner to completely respect the don’t kiss and tell rule. It is a sign of respect to remain quiet about intimacy, whether you made out on the couch or you had your first waterbed experience. In fact, it is most common for people to kiss and tell if they do not respect the person they were physical with. Basically, if you spill the beans about someone you really like, they may not like you so much for doing so.
2. Keepin’ it Old Skool
Social media, texting and cell phone pics and videos have created an instant communication gateway. This causes new challenges for remaining tight lipped about our dating and personal lives and relationships. It can be tempting to change your relationship status, upload images and share videos about your date or dates. However, make sure the other party is fully informed and consenting before forwarding, posting or sharing any potentially inappropriate media.
3. Rumors Run Wild
We have all heard rumors and know how fast they can spread. Unfortunately, by nature rumors tend to be inaccurate and yet many people believe even the most extreme rumors. Some people even consider rumors to be facts and become judgmental. This is why not sharing stories or private sexual information to yourself is truly the way to go. The truth is your co-workers, classmates or family members do not need to know your business. Keeping your intimate matters on the down low will keep you completely out of the rumor mill.
4. Privacy Matters
Sometimes reputation is all we have. When it comes to landing or keeping a dream job, being a good role model for your kids or being an upstanding member of the community, you want to portray the best possible version of yourself. You want the world to see who you are, your life goals and the good things you have already accomplished. What is not important to convey those around you is who you have or have not slept with. Do not put your rep on the line.
5. Bragging is Immature
Although bragging is immediately gratifying and is often accompanied by positive reinforcement from friends, it can be devastating in the long run. Try not to rely on sexual conquests for praise from others. This can lead to low self-esteem when a dating slump or drought arises. True adults should find this outward praise from other personal achievements and leave the bragging about banging to those who are more immature.